it is to Barker that i owe many proverbially wasted minutes of my day, and i can't bear the thought that this stuff evaporates into the ether without at least a chuckle or two. so onwards, more minutiae...
on the panic of apartment hunting.
Calm thy self, Virginia Wolf.
i know. GAH! where is my coat?! where are my rocks?! where is the river?!
Stop it.
could i live in the river?
No. At least not for long. Well. Maybe if you keep your head above water.
erg. what if it's the wrong place?
i know.
but what if it is?
Quit it.
i'm trying.
(what if it is?)
Stop it.
perhaps i could build a dam.
Ahem. That would make you a beaver.
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on tattoos and winkles.
NO DIRECTIONAL FLAMES.
Not ON my winkle, on my tummy silly!
NO DIRECTIONAL FLAMES.
Heh heh.
heheh Nothing. no directional flames.
How about travel stamps? Use-by-date stamps? Chaste arrows and dotted lines?
Cut-along-dotted-line directions?
harrumph. how 'bout "RETURN TO SENDER".
Ha!
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on sheltered existence.
you Obviously live under a rock.
Well duh.
it's okay. it's an easier transition to the cemetery when the time comes.
I've already picked out my urn.
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on morals and ethics.
... I think it's important to discern ethics
from morals.
sigh. okay. i'm not feeling moral or ethical today.
Hmmm... What's that like for you?
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2 comments:
oh no. i meant it in a Good way.
sigh.
my social skills are going to Hell along with my mind.
anyhoo.
may the volleys continue unabated, Sir Barker!
Good luck with your apartment hunt, Stef! I don't know what kind of place you're looking for, but I have a friend who is looking for a fourth roommate, if you're into living with three other people. Drop me an e-mail if you're interested, I'll get you the deets. Cheers!
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