01 May 2005

did i say i was taking a hiatus?

i lied.
i ran into an old friend the other day and was, as is my wont, Very excited. i hadn't seen him in ages and he is a dear and wonderful person. unfortunately, my good humour waned somewhat when, in the course of our four minute conversation, he successfully managed to steer the topic away from what his own life at least three times. he asked about my activities and seemed to assume i was content to go on about them self-absorbedly with nary an interest in his own diversions.
in fact, he seemed Hellbent on keeping me at arms length in every way. the vibe was Weird, dear reader(s), and i didn't get it. but it made me feel distant,disappointed, and just plain shunned.
then when he left, i felt guilty and invasive for asking about his life, like i had stumbled on some nasty little secret of a man, which i know for a fact is not true. he's happily partnered, a respectible citizen, engaged in legal pursuits, always was. (heheh, famous last words)
then i wondered for a moment (Conjecture, of course) if he was feeling defensive 'coz we were once involved for a short while and he thought i was lavishing him with inappropriate attentions by showing an interest.
this is not the first time or the first person this has happened with.
so, Just in Case this is the reason...
i am effusive with/about MANY people, male and female, and with a willful disregard for their status in my life (be it acquaintance, friend, lover) if i like you, you're Stuck with my Effusiveness. DEAL WITH IT.

and Rest Assured that just because i am effusive does NOT mean i'm imagining you without any pants on.

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