this rumination comes on the heels of a varied and wonderful dinner conversation last night on fictitious demons of the brain. perhaps we (well, some of us) find it so much easier to dwell on the past and its regretful perambulations, because it makes it easier to appreciate the good stuff Right Now.
that is, what kind of a state would we be in if all we could remember about the past were the great things, the things we still want to be with us! the nostalgia would be Utterly Crippling. at least regret or the desire to dissasociate with past mistakes helps us to see our way forward in the present...it makes the work to be done very clear.
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in Rumi-nation nostlgia is Utterly Rippling; past pleasures guide Re-creation and mistakes are viewed as seeds needing germination.
As the dinner companion in question (Hi Stef) I feel compelled to comment - I myself suffer from a difficulty in appreciating the gains of the present in measure against the losses of the past - and in fact find that residual bitterness makes the sweetness of current conditions bittersweet at best. Though it is hard for me even to entertain nostlgia for past pleasures (all of which have succumbed between the mandibles of time and regret), I do accept that the seeds of wisdom are sewn in every mistake, but with such an accumulation of mistakes, sometimes the ground, despite its proliferation of bitter seeds, seems deceptively barren and despairing of prospects for growth, and it is hard for me even to see the fireweeds that do glow through the debris with their fierce promise. - M.
i'm not sure what it means when my thoughts make it onto this blog before they make it to the necessary ears, probably a level of narcissism that will soon lead to sociopathy, restrictive tethers, and special diet, but it's modern, i suppose, if nothing else.
it is true, mister m, what you say, but i really don't think the ground is ever barren. the seeds might be kindda fucked, but it's how you feed 'em that determines that.
the ground's not barren.
you just can't see the grass for the dirt.
and, of course, it is february, which makes that all the more true. spring ensues! fret not!
n o s t a l g i a
a n a l o g s -i t
a- g o a l -s t a i n
a -l o s t -g a i n
i -s a n g -a l o t
a -g i a n t- s o l
a -s a t i n- l o g
s a t -i n- g o a l
a -l a s t- g o -i n
a -g l o a t -s i n
a -s i g n a l -t o
a -l a s t i n g -o
a l i g n s -t a o
a -n a g s -t o i l
l o s t- a g a i n
n o s t a l g i a
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